Read or Listen to me!
So I found my collarbones this morning.
I know that may not sound like a big deal, but trust me, it is.
I haven’t seen them in over 5 years.
Like I had mentioned, I am on this “wedding slim my shit down” mission. No one wants to be photographed in a white dress while wearing 50 extra pounds.
And since said dress just came in, it’s time to get it done. Alterations are one thing, double alterations are so not on the agenda, or in the budget.
This thought comes after looking for maternity bridesmaids dresses for one of my girls. In case you were curious, there are like zero cute maternity bridesmaid dresses out there.
What I did discover, though, is looking at maternity clothes causes me to fall deep into a baby fever which is neither productive nor practical at this moment. Damn you hormones!
Jake and I have talked about having kids exactly twice.
Over the last 5 years, he has made his point very clear that kids are not on the agenda.
That was until about a month ago when out of the blue he stated: “I think I’d like to have kids with you.” Kinda like he was stating that a nice light salad would be good for dinner.
Stunned, I quickly replied, oh yeah? To which he said, “yeah, you’re the only person I’d want to have kids with.”
I know most of you are saying, aw, how sweet! What I was thinking: 1. Who are you what did you do with my future husband? and 2.I should hope I’m the only person you want to have kids with, we are about to get married. If you want to have kids with the bitch down the street, we have bigger problems.
Please note,the lady down the street is lovely and not a bitch at all. However, I will cut you if you mess with my man, so yeah.
Getting back to the collarbones, I have been eating a LOT of salad. Since we are on a super budget, I have been taking advantage of the .99 cent heads of iceberg lettuce at Safeway. I would have to say, at less than .25 a meal, it’s the best of both worlds. And, has led to the shedding of over 2lbs last week.
I am weird about lettuce. Like, it super creeps me out and I need to look it over with a fine tooth comb before I eat it. But for some reason, Iceberg is safe in my book. However, it’s not the most exciting of the greens.
So I decided to mix it up a bit and make a charred baby blue salad.
Basically, it’s a lazy ladies dream salad, as you don’t really cut it up. And it only takes 5 minutes.
Start with a whole head of iceberg. Note, you could use Romaine instead, but that isn’t on sale this week. What you are looking for is a nice tight head of lettuce, this will all make sense in a minute.
Once you remove the icky leaves and wash, you will want to leave the hard core at the bottom and cut the head into wedges. You can do this however you like but this is what I ended up with:
Then, and this is the magic, you are going to put the wedges on the grill or directly on your gas burner on high. Sorry, electric won’t work here, trust me.
I was freaking out at this point, certain that lettuce was flammable and I just didn’t know it. It’s not. And, it will be ok.
Leave the lettuce over the high heat until you see a nice char developing then turn.
Get all the cut sides of the lettuce nice and charred and remove it from the heat.
I put crumbled blue cheese and bacon on mine. We always have cooked bacon around the house so it makes it easy to crumble a few strips and sprinkle at will.
Top this with a blue cheese dressing and fuck yeah, charred baby blue salad!
You could also mix this up by adding strips of delicious flank steak, but that isn’t on sale this week.